Over the course of the past six months, I’ve lost four relatives.  First, my father died in September.  Then my Uncle Bill from California died.  After that, my Uncle Howard (“Junior”) died.  Most recently, my Uncle Patrick died.  I mourn them all, as I was, at one time or another, close to each of them.  But I still mourn my Dad daily.  I think about how he could do such amazing things with cars and I can barely check my own oil.  I remember that he could fix anything—like for example, a clogged sink.  I can at least read the directions on the bottle of Liquid Plumber.  I think about how he worked hard because he considered his family more important than anything else.


I have felt my heart filled with an unexplainable anxiety as of late.  My heart was beating with a fear that I just could not understand.  In Philippians 4:6-7, Paul tells us, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (NIV)


God has revealed to me that, in my attempts to forget about this fear, I have been ignoring my family.  And I have been.  I’ve been away from home at least two nights a week.  One of those days has been on Sundays, which had always been our family day.  So I am going to be making some important changes from this point forward.  After church, Sundays will belong to only my family.  No exceptions or excuses.  I am not going to be away from home gaming on Wednesday nights anymore.  I am scrapping the RPG that did not involve my wife in it.  I am going to do everything to make sure that my wife and daughter are at the top of my life, right under Jesus.




My friend, Bobby, is currently at the hospital with his wife, who is in labor.  We know that they are having a little girl and my prayers are with them.  When my wife and daughter get home this evening, we will be going up there to see them.


Until next time, God Bless.



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2 responses to “

  1. Hey, Jeff.

    I still miss my mum, too, and I suppose I always will. The thing I remember most about her is how much love she had for me.

    On the RPG front, don’t be so hard on yourself. I see things differently because I live alone. One of the things I don’t like about modern life is that families have become so nuclear.

    It’s important to have friends and it’s important to do activities together. Imagine how a person in my position would feel if I lost a friend every time a marriage occurred.

    (By the way, consider opening comments to the public. I’m only able to post here because I have a WordPress account.)


  2. Actually, I was beginning to feel disconnected from my wife. We’ve been through alot over the past three years, like losing our home near St. Louis, and these things can be hard on a marriage. But I love Sarah and I want to make sure that she knows it.

    On the RPG front, I was actually going to end the other game, anyway. There were only three other players and one of them, ironically, pulled out because he is pursuing a relationship. Go figure. I still have the one that I play that includes my wife, and the other two players from the second game are in that one, too.